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Lockdown 2; Not coping

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 I have finally reached the end of my increasingly shrinking tether. I am still totally exhausted, Once I get to sleep I don't want to get up or wake up again. Andy is currently passed out on the other sofa, Mikey is doing something decidedly important up stairs and as usual I'm alone and trying to keep myself occupied. My other option is to go upstairs and go to sleep - but both cats are currently up there and would not be happy to have any company. This is the real disadvantage of living in this area, all my family etc are in Maidstone/Medway and as I am considered Clinically Vunerable I can't go anywhere. so I assume I will now continue to be feeling alone and unwanted. I don't even have enough energy to drive anywhere. Plus my left shoulder is still really painful along with both Kidneys complaining and I just want the pain to stop, even for one day woiuld be better than anything |I have experienced this year. Chronic diseases are horrible as I look completely healt...

Lockdown 2. Getting real now

We have completed a week and a day now. And I can no longer say that Covid 19 has not affected my life. At the end of the 1st lockdown I was happy to say that I did not know anyone Covid had taken. I am not able to say this as I got a message on Thursday to tell me that someone I knew through Facebook died at the end of October. I knew she had been in hospital as I spoke to her while she was, but she gave no indication that anything was terminal. She was always a lovely, happy person to talk to and I will miss her...  I have also had a bright idea....I want to make a blanket ready for when I have to start dialysis and as I am unable to knit I decided to try crochet!!! I have found that I am brilliant at making the initial chain, I can sit and do that happily for hours! But if I then try to add a second row all hell breaks loose! I do appear to have invented a version of creating holes in a circle, I was trying to follow some instructions but she lost me very quickly so I've just ca...

Lockdown 2 Day 6

 Nearly at the end of week 1! Tomorrow the Country will come to a halt to remember all of those who have made the ultimate sacrifice for our freedom. This year we are also thinking about those who we have lost this year. I'f I'm honest it is all rather overwhelming for me. I've never known people personally affected before but 2020 has changed that for everyone. I've been over emotional for a few days (since Sunday) and even The 1 Show had me in tears this evening. It is getting more and more difficult to explain why to people and the most crazy things set me off. We are currently watching the 1st of the new Holby Episodes and I can feel the eyes getting watery just looking back at what this virus has done to us this year. I can only pray that we don't have to live through another year like this again. To be honest I don't think I can...

Lockdown 2 Day 4

 I am totally fed up now, and we still have 24 days to go! My fatigue has increased and even when I sleep for 12 hours I still wake up even more tired. I can't cope with much more of this exhaustion as all I do is let Mikey and Andy down. The darkness in the UK right now is also making things far more difficult for me. I always hate this time of year and this year it is even worse. I think I need to change hemispheres every 6 months so my days don't ever get as short as they are now. The good thing is that within 45 days the nights will start getting shorter. This evening I inflicted a total chick flic on Andy, Holidate, a Netflix film. I really enjoyed it, not at all taxing and followed exactly the route you would expect. The leading man was decidedly easy on the eyes and was originally in Home and Away  I believe. Australia does turn out some rather cute leading men!  This week will, probably, mostly be spent nagging Andy into letting me put the tree up! My main reason ...

Lockdown 2 Day 3

Unfortunately this week has continued being extremely tough for me. I have basically been put back into shielding - not quite the same as Lockdown 1 as they don't appear to have put quite so many of us into it. For some reason Diabetes is not considered a high risk issue, nor asthma, but CKD is actually mentioned by stage... This has meant I couldn't head into the woods on Thursday, or any Thursday during this lockdown. This has not helped my mindset as it has been proved that the smells of woodland do help people the relax in the best possible way. But the way I am aching constantly at the moment means that just coping with the walk up to the camp would be a little tough for me to deal/cope with right now. Hopefully the problems toad Mikey has been encountering has now been dealt with. If my child comes home with more bruises the explosion will be heard of the whole country and the school may well end up flattened. The bruises resulting from his showdown on the way home are no...

Lockdown; Take 2

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I got my e-mail last night from the Health Secretary putting me back into shielding. Not quite as harsh as last time, but basically I'm still stuck at home until 2 December... Our Lockdown started at 00.01 this morning,  in theory I was due in Marchwood this afternoon for a session. Andy has not been too happy about me going as to be honest I am really not feeling too well and my fatigue is just constantly worsening. (The usual treatment is just anti-depressants but I am limited with what my kidneys can cope with and most just make me eat constantly!) so I don't think he was too upset I wasn't going! I did contact Karen and also requested to self refer for January...Hopefully I may have that to look forward to! Mikey appears to have had a better day today...the girl who kicked him has been told that whatever he might have said, kicking him is not an acceptable response. The toad who was bullying him has been told to stay away and Mikey has promised to tell his teachers if h...

The Eve of Lockdown V.0002

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 6 hours and 57 minutes until we are back in lockdown...Hopefully all the morons who thought it was all over and done with will behave and stop trying to find ways around the rules; it is only for 4 weeks after all, not exactly long in the grand scheme of life! This time schools are not closing, but all activities which tire out children are! If kids are not a risk linked to  transmission of this thing why can't they dash around and play sport? I would love to hear the science behind this decision, and let Mikey and his friends debate it with them! That may reverse the decision pretty rapidly! Mikey seems to be finding school particularly tough at the moment because of 1 obnoxious boy. This wimp is using mind games on Mikey who is certainly bigger than him. Mikey was threatened during the House Captain elections about what would happen if he voted for anyone else which worried him far too much until we discussed how elections work and the fact nobody else would know who he vot...