Lockdown 2020 and on

Amazingly I am still behaving and avoiding everyone!! I have not left the house and gone anywhere for most of November. Right now I'm getting to know very grumbly kidneys but trying to avoid painkillers as the ones I have do have a pretty nasty side effect which doesn't leave me feeling at all comfortable! |Today for lunch I took to easy option and just stuck some part bake rolls in the oven. Mikey declared recently that he doesn't like these any more so Andy and I shared them. By the time I gad eaten 1 his Imperial highness appeared and changed his declaration as he was 'only joking' and my lunch disappeared very quickly....and not into me!! Unfortunately I am having a munchy day and the bag of frazzles I was allowed to eat did not fill me up 😕  I have already decided what dinner is...wonder if Andy wants it early!! Sleep is still proving problematic to say the least. I know I am exhausted and I need a few weeks worth of sleep, but once up stairs it just doesn...

 The news this week has been full of information about various vaccines. A question was asked on Facebook about who would have it. I appear to be in a very small minority as I feel we need it in order to get vaguely back to whatever normal will be in the future. One friend is concerned as they do not yet know how long any antibodies will last, that doesn't bother me too much as I guess everyone will be monitored and we can be topped up if needed! As I have not left home over the last 2 weeks I am battling cabin fever again. Today has been wet and horrible, plus I was up all night and once I went to bed I was woken by a couple of calls from school so I am now running on zero. What usually happens at this point is that I pass out and finally get some sleep. Hopefully that will happen again and I will sleep regardless of any snoring happening! Failing that I still have quite a few episodes of Call the Midwife to watch and we have only watched 1 episode of The Crown so far... Mikey has...

 My mental wellbeing has had one heck of a knock this weekend. I spent all of last week actually feeling fragile, but over the weekend it had increased in its ferocity.  I am totally exhausted and sleeping is not helping it ease in the slightest. If I'm honest I could happily fall asleep and stay that way for as long as possible. A second Coma is exceedingly appealing right now. When I am awake the pains and aches are getting progessively worse. My elbows are so painful I just want to cry. I can't phone my GP as telling them I have no energy and just ache sounds pathetic; but it is affecting my everyday life now. Moving hurts and my head is so dizzy all the time walking or moving in a straight line simply doesn't happen. I know my GP will just tell me that it is all linked to my CKD and there is nothing that can be done. Does this mean I know have years of this ahead of me and how do I get to enjoy my existance again? If I can't what is the point of carrying on? Maybe i...

 I have finally reached the end of my increasingly shrinking tether. I am still totally exhausted, Once I get to sleep I don't want to get up or wake up again. Andy is currently passed out on the other sofa, Mikey is doing something decidedly important up stairs and as usual I'm alone and trying to keep myself occupied. My other option is to go upstairs and go to sleep - but both cats are currently up there and would not be happy to have any company. This is the real disadvantage of living in this area, all my family etc are in Maidstone/Medway and as I am considered Clinically Vunerable I can't go anywhere. so I assume I will now continue to be feeling alone and unwanted. I don't even have enough energy to drive anywhere. Plus my left shoulder is still really painful along with both Kidneys complaining and I just want the pain to stop, even for one day woiuld be better than anything |I have experienced this year. Chronic diseases are horrible as I look completely healt...

We have completed a week and a day now. And I can no longer say that Covid 19 has not affected my life. At the end of the 1st lockdown I was happy to say that I did not know anyone Covid had taken. I am not able to say this as I got a message on Thursday to tell me that someone I knew through Facebook died at the end of October. I knew she had been in hospital as I spoke to her while she was, but she gave no indication that anything was terminal. She was always a lovely, happy person to talk to and I will miss her...  I have also had a bright idea....I want to make a blanket ready for when I have to start dialysis and as I am unable to knit I decided to try crochet!!! I have found that I am brilliant at making the initial chain, I can sit and do that happily for hours! But if I then try to add a second row all hell breaks loose! I do appear to have invented a version of creating holes in a circle, I was trying to follow some instructions but she lost me very quickly so I've just ca...

 Nearly at the end of week 1! Tomorrow the Country will come to a halt to remember all of those who have made the ultimate sacrifice for our freedom. This year we are also thinking about those who we have lost this year. I'f I'm honest it is all rather overwhelming for me. I've never known people personally affected before but 2020 has changed that for everyone. I've been over emotional for a few days (since Sunday) and even The 1 Show had me in tears this evening. It is getting more and more difficult to explain why to people and the most crazy things set me off. We are currently watching the 1st of the new Holby Episodes and I can feel the eyes getting watery just looking back at what this virus has done to us this year. I can only pray that we don't have to live through another year like this again. To be honest I don't think I can...

 I am totally fed up now, and we still have 24 days to go! My fatigue has increased and even when I sleep for 12 hours I still wake up even more tired. I can't cope with much more of this exhaustion as all I do is let Mikey and Andy down. The darkness in the UK right now is also making things far more difficult for me. I always hate this time of year and this year it is even worse. I think I need to change hemispheres every 6 months so my days don't ever get as short as they are now. The good thing is that within 45 days the nights will start getting shorter. This evening I inflicted a total chick flic on Andy, Holidate, a Netflix film. I really enjoyed it, not at all taxing and followed exactly the route you would expect. The leading man was decidedly easy on the eyes and was originally in Home and Away  I believe. Australia does turn out some rather cute leading men!  This week will, probably, mostly be spent nagging Andy into letting me put the tree up! My main reason ...