Lockdown, Day 103

Today has been extremely tough...Poor Andy got to sleep pretty quickly last night - but his snoring got going far too loudly so I decamped downstairs to the sofa!! Both cats joined me down there until Rory felt he needed to go out. Because Misty has a habit of bringing presents back (she is not impressed with my hunting skills) Andy has been locking the cat flap at night. Rory is very aware of this but obviously is not happy as he was doing his best to throw himself through the door! I gave in and let them both out and then tried to doze, but I could still hear Andy so it didn't exactly work!

Andy himself appeared just before 6 and sent me back up to bed, sleep at that point was not easy as I was very aware that I had a counselling appointment at 10 so refused to let myself fall asleep as I knew I needed to be awake for it! I am now paying for it as I'm in pain, exhausted and have lost any appetite I had. Andy and Mikey are having the traditional Thursday evening KFC, to me at the moment it just tasted too greasy and salty, not good when I have a force 9 storm in my stomach! 

Mikey was meant to be having a face to face bubble at school today, but the poxy UK summer put paid to that by raining all afternoon meaning a gathering on the school field was not exactly viable! Mikey was not unhappy as he is slightly worried about the lack of work other than maths that he has done in the last 4 months. I have now suggested that he write a story based on his favourite X Box game instead. Apparently this will be started tomorrow!! I don't think I will bother to hold my breath though!!

My counsellor and I are trying a 2 week gap between sessions now. My measures are now at the bottom of the severe range so I now have to survive until the 16th July before we speak again...I know I should be able to cope with no problems, but I do feel as though some bully has stolen my security blanket and it is knawing at the edges of my anxiety. But I've coped with everything this week so I just have to keep everything we have been talking about at the front of my mind and look after me! I'm even tempted to try to learn more about my Ego, Super Ego and Id...we are meant to always be able to learn something new after all!

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